Existential Turkey Crisis

The next installment of the Blog-A-Week Series 

(I took Thanksgiving week off. Hope y'all don't mind.)

Thanksgiving of 2007 was a tough one. I had an existential crisis of sorts. One of those third-life crises jammies. One of those post-twentieth century postmodern navel gazing alone-in-a-crowd sort of thingies. The day itself was fine. I ate good food, got good news (J and K announced they were pregnant), and spent time with good people. But, I started to feel a little detached from my moorings, like I wasn't really a part of what was happening. I was upset about that for quite some time.

This Thanksgiving was different.

Still good food (Best. Turkey. Ever.) and good people, but the circumstances had changed quite a bit. It wasn't so much that I felt more in touch with the people I was with. It was that I felt more in touch with myself. I'm not saying the day didn't have its tough moments. But there were far more good ones than bad ones.

It's going to be a weird holiday being single for the first time in ten years. And, if I may give you some perspective on the issue, this will be only the second Christmas since I was seventeen where I'm a single gal. Now that is an odd thought. It's been seventeen years since I was seventeen, so that's a lot of damn holidays I spent as half of a whole. A lot of New Year's Eves kissing the same few people. A lot of Christmases I spent way too much money on gifts for my significant other. Signing cards from me and someone else. Well, guess what. I already made out about half of my Christmas cards, and they all just say, "Love, Hero." And you know something? That is okay.

Being single screws up the whole "Secret Santa" thing the crew had going for a bunch of years. But that's okay too. Life is change. We'll figure out a new way to exchange gifts. I've upset the apple cart, but I was always the rebel like that. Or so my tattoos would have you believe.

The people who are the most unhappy are the ones who cling to the stuff that has to change. So, while it hasn't been easy, it's been good. Good for me to change and grow and become a stronger person. I'm experiencing growing pains, I think. It's going to be a heck of a holiday season, though, I can tell you that. I'm growing so damn much, I won't be able to fit into my old winter coat anymore. Oh well, out with the old and in with the new. Life, coat, everything.

~Hero