Thanksgiving

Yesterday was Thanksgiving. I spent it with some friends and had a great time, but we didn't observe a tradition I've come to enjoy the last few years. You see, I like it when we go around the table and everyone talks about something they have been thankful for in the last year. So, because I didn't get to do it on the actual day, and since I am the only one around this particular table at the moment, here is a partial list of the things I am thankful for.

1. Health. Really, if you don't have this, everything else doesn't matter all that much. I have had a good year, in general. I give thanks for decent health care, including the flu shot and whooping cough vaccine that helped me out. Also, I'm grateful to have a lifestyle that allows me to sleep a respectable amount of hours every night, eat food that's good for me (not all the time, though), and moderately exercise.

2. A Network of Supportive Family and Friends. From the time I was born, I was blessed with a family who supports me, no matter how kooky my choices may seem. As I have gotten older, I have had the luxury of surrounding myself with people who have a positive influence on me and who I enjoy spending time with. Also, in the last few years, I've gotten better at asking for and accepting help from the people who love me.

3. A Job. We all know it's crap out there now. It's getting better, sure, but it has been a load off my mind to have a job that not only pays the rent and bills, but that I actually enjoy doing.

4. Writing. So, after finishing my second novel a year ago, I've done absolutely nothing to get it out there. Still, I'm keeping at it. Over the summer, I wrote quite a bit of a new novel and I've been working on this academic book I have a contract(!) for. I still hold out hope for the day when I can teach a little less and write a little more. And when I have an agent (or the time to find one).

5. Conferences. One of my favorite ways to travel. I love visiting a new city for the first time because I'm attending a conference there. About a month ago, I got to go to Indianapolis for the AMS, and I know Indiana doesn't sound like Vegas, but I'd never been there before (and probably wouldn't have ended up there any other way), and I thought it was charmant!

6. Me Lunches. On days when I don't have classes to teach, sometimes I like to take myself out to lunch. People do this every day, I understand, but I've been packing my own lunch for years. I figure I deserve lunch out once in a while. And I like to indulge whatever whim I have. If that means driving a few extra miles to get to the particular restaurant where I want to eat, so be it.

7. Football. American and European. I've been enjoying most of USC's season (but Oy, Oregon), but there have been some heartbreakers too. I also loved the World Cup this summer. I really enjoy watching my teams play.

8. My New Apartment. I can walk to work. Need I say more? Also, there's just a zen-like peace that goes along with the place. I have no idea why. It's just instantly calming when I walk inside.

9. Boardwalk Empire. I just. I love this show. Everybody in it is excellent, and I really love that the characters talk like people did back then. Nucky called someone "Johnny on the spot" a couple of weeks ago. That rocks!

10. Crafts. I made Halloween lollipops this year and I hope to do the same for the December holidays. Also, I spent many hours today making my holiday cards. There is something very soothing about designing and creating something and then sharing it with people you love.

Existential Turkey Crisis

The next installment of the Blog-A-Week Series 

(I took Thanksgiving week off. Hope y'all don't mind.)

Thanksgiving of 2007 was a tough one. I had an existential crisis of sorts. One of those third-life crises jammies. One of those post-twentieth century postmodern navel gazing alone-in-a-crowd sort of thingies. The day itself was fine. I ate good food, got good news (J and K announced they were pregnant), and spent time with good people. But, I started to feel a little detached from my moorings, like I wasn't really a part of what was happening. I was upset about that for quite some time.

This Thanksgiving was different.

Still good food (Best. Turkey. Ever.) and good people, but the circumstances had changed quite a bit. It wasn't so much that I felt more in touch with the people I was with. It was that I felt more in touch with myself. I'm not saying the day didn't have its tough moments. But there were far more good ones than bad ones.

It's going to be a weird holiday being single for the first time in ten years. And, if I may give you some perspective on the issue, this will be only the second Christmas since I was seventeen where I'm a single gal. Now that is an odd thought. It's been seventeen years since I was seventeen, so that's a lot of damn holidays I spent as half of a whole. A lot of New Year's Eves kissing the same few people. A lot of Christmases I spent way too much money on gifts for my significant other. Signing cards from me and someone else. Well, guess what. I already made out about half of my Christmas cards, and they all just say, "Love, Hero." And you know something? That is okay.

Being single screws up the whole "Secret Santa" thing the crew had going for a bunch of years. But that's okay too. Life is change. We'll figure out a new way to exchange gifts. I've upset the apple cart, but I was always the rebel like that. Or so my tattoos would have you believe.

The people who are the most unhappy are the ones who cling to the stuff that has to change. So, while it hasn't been easy, it's been good. Good for me to change and grow and become a stronger person. I'm experiencing growing pains, I think. It's going to be a heck of a holiday season, though, I can tell you that. I'm growing so damn much, I won't be able to fit into my old winter coat anymore. Oh well, out with the old and in with the new. Life, coat, everything.

~Hero